Wednesday, January 4, 2012

2012

I am in total denial that 2011 is over. How can it be?! Just yesterday I was watching Georgia get annihilated by play UCF at the Liberty Bowl... Stella JUST turned five... Savanah just finished second grade... We just took the trip from hell our relaxing PCB vacation... We JUST started homeschool... It was a whole year of things that absolutely FLEW by. Don't get me wrong... There are plenty of things (and people!!) that I am beyond thankful were left in the past year. But the memories with the girls, memories with friends... It breaks my heart that that time is gone.

This year, I want to change things up a bit. I want to be excited to go to church instead of looking at it as a chore. It's time for me to take a step back from all the volunteering and really be present in my daily walk with God. I want to be present during my time with the girls. Most days Sometimes I find myself getting frustrated with them for little things (not picking up dirty clothes, bickering between the two of them, the incessant rambling about nothing at all), and I need to work on that. Both of them are smart, funny, kind girls who still have SO MUCH to learn... I need patience to take that on, and be joyful in it. Another thing I hope to work on is, well, ME. Coming out of an emotionally unstable relationship, I can say with 100% certainty that I am not the same person I used to be. Yes, I have grown and changed for the good in ways, but I also lost chunks of myself that I need to get back. It's time to do some things for myself. Go back to school. Figure out "what I want to be when I grow up". Be 100% debt free. Treat myself with the same respect I give to others. I can't expect my daughters to grow up with good, healthy self images if their own mother doesn't have one. My standards have been raised. People who don't meet them are gone. Life is so incredibly short... I am determined to make it sweet by keeping good people in it.

And to end on a not sappy note, the fun stuff (hopefully) coming up in the new year:
Skydiving
NOLA
Not dying as I run my 1st 1/2 marathon!
Find a hobby (other than drinking wine, I've mastered that one)
Actually DO some of the crafts I've Pinned
Take the girls on a weekend trip, just the 3 of us

1 comment:

Delta Daisies said...

I love this post. Good for you! You deserve happiness :)