Monday, January 9, 2012

Walking Away From Stress

Last year when the ex and I ended things, I threw myself into volunteering. I go to a wonderful, amazing church, and the opportunities to be involved are endless... So I signed up for everything, and said no to nothing. I stayed busy every single day, met an amazing group of ladies (& their kiddos and mine get along great), and didn't give myself time to think about being sad. I was just too darn busy to focus on it.

In the past few months, I've felt the need to slow down. With the girls back in a regular school setting, constantly going non-stop in the evenings has been super difficult. Their bedtime is at 7:30, but with the extra activities there are nights they don't get in bed before nine! With the new year, I've decided to make some changes. I'm cutting way back in my volunteering. That has been a very, very hard decision to make, as I truly feel like I'm letting people down... Either way, though, I've got to put my family first, and adding myself as a priority in there somewhere.

Finding a job is at the top of my "To Do" list. I always have known I am not cut out to be a stay at home mom. I LOVE my kids, but let's face it, being home with children all day can make anybody nuts. Working gives me an outlet, ADULT INTERACTION, and a sense of worth. People say it all the time, but it is HARD out there in the job market! There are sooo many folks out there with way more education than I've got that are applying for the same dinky entry level things as me... Which means two things. One, I have got to PRAY that someone realizes how much I really do love to work and will work my rear off. And two, I have GOT to get back in school. I re-registered to U of M the other night (and had a panic attack when I did, but hey, no biggie)... Probably won't go back till this fall, but even if it's only a few night classes per semester, it's TIME.

In the meantime, I'll be working on a few projects at home, trying to get better organized... Pretty much just doing the best I can do at the things that mean the most to me. I'm also working on just plain ol' having more faith. I know he's got it all under control.

1 comment:

K-Fun said...

Good luck finding a job!! And you won't let anyone down by cutting back on volunteer hours! Your fam definitely comes first! :-)