Saturday, November 24, 2012

27

My entire life, any big day- recitals, first days of school, holidays, and especially birthdays- were always interrupted by someone else. And when I say interrupted, I kinda mean hijacked and crashed into a building. For the longest time, I would spend so many hours just HOPING that the day would go well, no one would get mad and yell or argue and fight... But it never happened that way. We can safely say that certain people in my family have a flair for the dramatic. I was so excited once I turned 18, because I thought for sure that once I was "an adult", no one would be able to ruin stuff anymore.

Bless my heart. Not only did my family keep doing what they'd always done, I seemed to have the magic gift of choosing boyfriends who were just like my crazy family. I got to the point over the past few years where I just didn't want to celebrate it at all. I made my own birthday dinner, I had people come to my house, I was adamant that I didn't want any gifts... All so I wouldn't get upset when the dinner I was promised didn't happen, or the person who was hosting decided they couldn't handle being around anyone, and so I didn't get a guilt trip for someone spending money on me. Needless to say, this year I was just kinda hoping to fly under the radar and let the day be over as soon as it came. Until now.

Funny how the past month and a half has gone. I am saying things and doing things and feeling things I never have before. This man in my life is just so incredibly amazing in every sense of the word... And it's totally because of him that today was the best birthday I have ever, EVER had as an adult, quite possibly my entire 27 years. It wasn't the breakfast and coffee and mimosas. It wasn't the gorgeous roses. It wasn't the awesome, perfect gifts. Wasn't the lunch at my fave place with my fave birthday cake. It was him. Every single time he looks at me I just want to smile and cry and kiss him all at once... Because I have never had anyone look at me like he does, or treat me like he does. Never been so trusting of someone and felt so comfortable and at ease with someone.

The past year has been so exhausting. An extreme roller coaster of emotions with some really low lows, and what I thought were some pretty high highs... But I was so wrong- those highs are nothing compared to the past month. I am just so incredibly thankful for our paths crossing again the way they did, when they did. Here's to the next year. Not trying to jinx anything, but I really think this could be the best year ever. I'm ready for it.

No comments: